💀 depressing calculators

a collection of calculators that tell you the truth about life, money, and time. math doesn't lie. it just hurts.

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When Will I Be a Millionaire?
Your savings ÷ one million. The honest answer to a question you probably shouldn't ask.
live — try it
📅
Your Life in Weekends
How many Saturdays you have left. Spoiler: fewer than you think. Way fewer.
coming soon
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Is It Worth Your Time?
Your real hourly rate — including commute, anxiety, and getting dressed. It's less than you think.
coming soon
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The Retirement Countdown
How many working days until you're free. It's a big number. A very big number.
coming soon

what is this?

depressing calculators is a collection of free online tools that do simple math about your life — and present the results with uncomfortable honesty. no compound interest fantasies. no "just invest $500/month and you'll be rich" pep talks. just division, subtraction, and the occasional existential crisis.

we built this because every financial calculator on the internet lies to you with optimistic projections. we thought you deserved the baseline truth. you're welcome. sorry.

every calculator is free, works on any device, and requires zero signup. your data stays in your browser — we don't store anything. we can barely store our own emotions.